dealing with stress.

Stress is one of the most annoying parts about life and I’m sure that everyone reading this has experienced it more than once in their lifetime. It’s a mind set that is extremely easy to get lost in, but a bit more on the difficult side when you are trying to get out of it.

Stressing out about situations in life whether it be external or internal is easy. Pointing out the less favorable things in life is easy. When I begin to feel stressed, I could effortlessly rehearse the situation and make myself believe that  it’s never going to change. One of the most annoying parts about stress is when a bunch of situations come all at once; something that normally wouldn’t bother you in the slightest, when paired with a bunch of other small things, can make you feel like the whole world is against you.

I’m definitely not an expert in dealing with the stresses that life brings, but I think we all have little pieces of advice that we could offer to each other that can help us get through the not-so-fun parts of life.

I get lost in my head a lot; when some annoying event happens in my life, my automatic response is to rehearse my current condition over and over again. I start to analyze what happened, what will (but probably won’t) happen, and what everything means. Typically most of my thoughts turn negative and instead of moving on with my day, I allow this one (or consecutive events) to alter how I go about the rest of my day.

After I’ve decided my initial response is probably not the best solution, I try and reverse its effects by rehearsing true facts instead of the ones I have made up. I do this by putting things into perspective and assuring myself that the situation is probably not as bad as I am making it out to be. I remind myself that everything will be okay, and declare all of the promises and encouraging words of God. I typically blast worship music and write what I’m feeling down so I can pinpoint all of the negative thoughts I need to counter. I tell myself that eventually, I will be okay; having a bad moment does not equate to having a bad life.

This next part is something that I’m having to work on a lot, which is telling people how I feel. I’m sure I’ve said this in other blog posts, but I am not a huge fan of showing my weaknesses and sharing my feelings is not something I am typically comfortable with. But I’ve come to the conclusion that not sharing how I feel would be worse for me than maintaining a facade of never having issues. I’ve found that as soon as I share what’s going on in my life with someone else, they usually express that they have been feeling the same way, or that they have felt the same way before. Instead of feeling like I have to tough it out by myself, I now have a person I can go to for encouragement and remind me that I’m not in it alone and that things, with time, will get better. Sharing my feelings with others has a dual effect because it also keeps me from secluding myself in my room and being upset that no one notices I’m hurt. You don’t have to do life alone! And if you don’t have people that you can talk to, get plugged in at your church, or school, or job, or wherever else you meet people.

One of the most encouraging things for me to think about is that in Christ, we already have victory. Every situation we step into, we have authority over. I remember my Dad saying that the trouble isn’t in us trying to win, because through Jesus, we already have victory; the real challenge is sticking it out in the process. We have been given peace, joy, and a sound mind, but getting to a point where we can truly accept these gifts and declare them over our lives may take a minute. In times of stress, I am aware that God is greater than the situation and that I can still be at peace, but it tends to be harder to convince myself of such. This is where trust comes in to play. I have to make the decision to trust that even though I am not feeling 100, that God is working things out. Even when it seems like God is doing nothing, He’s doing something.

“Listen to the truth I speak to you: If someone says to this mountain with great faith and having no doubt, ‘Mountain, be lifted up and thrown into the midst of the sea,’ and believes that what he says will happen, it will be done.” – Mark 11:23

Kae

it’s freaking fall.

Wow, so it’s been fall for a whole week and I’m already loving it. I mean, it’s still 90 degrees in vegas, but the idea that the weather will soon be cooling down is still exciting. Sometime this week it’s supposed to rain, and I’m really ready.

So to commemorate the beginning of such a beautiful season, here are some of my favorite things happen in the fall:

• The weather being cool enough for you to layer your clothing.

I really love summer cause it allows you to do fun things like go out of town, take trips to the beach, and not be in school…but as far as clothing goes, outfits are just better in fall. You’re able to layer long sleeves with other jackets and wear sweatpants and flannels. The different combinations of outfits increase almost exponentially. I haven’t used half of my closet in a year because it was too hot to wear any of it. So to say I’m excited for that is an understatement.

• Hunting season.

This one more than likely doesn’t resonate with everyone, but it’s still one of my favorite parts about the fall. It’s a time when I get to go to random small towns like Ely or Penguitch with my Dad and enjoy the outdoors. It’s one of the only times I actually get to see what trees should look like in the fall, lol. We are able to stay in hotels that have the best hotel lotion/soap (THEY USE BATH & BODY WORKS STRESS RELIEF SCENT…amazing), eat at cute little restaurants, breathe in fresh air, and come back home with tons of memorable stories to tell.

• The looks and smells of fall.

I’m pretty sure everyone can relate to this one. There’s a certain smell that the fall brings with it. It’s a mixture of pumpkin, spice, cinnamon, and all the other warm fragrances. Everywhere you go, it smells like pumpkin-cinnamon candles, and I love it. Currently, I have hand sanitizer, lotion, and a wallflower that are all the scent of “Sweet Cinnamon Pumpkin.” Oh, and can’t forget about my Pumpkin Caramel Apple candle. Vegas may be lacking in the whole “leaves changing color thing,” but we are able to make up for that with the other super cute fall decorations like multi-colored pumpkins, fake autumn leaves, and earthy/neutral toned everything. And, making greeting cards is really fun around this time because of all the different halloween and fall themed puns you can make.

• MY BIRTHDAY.

One of my favorite things about the fall is that it’s my birthday!!!!! This year, I’ll be 19, which isn’t really a milestone…buuuuuut I’m grateful to have (almost) made another trip around the sun.

This month is actually filled with quite a few people’s birthdays that I know. My mom’s birthday is on the 8th and I actually know two other people that share my own birthday, one of those people being my aunt. To add on to that list, I have over 10 other family members and friends that were born in October. So this whole month is full of celebration, and if you know anything about me, you know that I love to celebrate not just my birthday, but celebrate the lives of other people in general. I’ll take any excuse to hang out with the people that I love.

I’m just really ready for all of the many activities that fall has to offer.

What are some of your favorite things about this season?

Kae

normality is a paved road.

Today, I wanted to draw attention to a really cool quote by Van Gogh, “Normality is a paved road. It’s comfortable to walk on, but no flowers grow on it.” The idea that remaining in a state of comfortability keeps us from living a life of adventure is not a new concept to grasp, but one that I often forget to apply to my own life.

Lately, I’ve been trying to make decisions and do things not because of the opinions or actions of others, but because it’s something that I genuinely want to do. It can be easy to become a people pleaser, doing things just for the approval, but that gets boring after a while. You sit back one day and ask yourself why you do what you do, and you can’t come up with an answer because of how much you’ve let other people control your life.

This can show up in subtle ways, but even then, we are depriving the world of our true self. Everyone knows that they are unique, but a lot of us do not truly realize the importance of embracing that. We all have something different to offer the world. While you standing out from the crowd may not seem worthwhile or convenient now, know that even when you’re unaware of it, you being your authentic self makes the world a better place.

Being like other people may be efficient for a little while, but true fulfillment comes from being who God has called you to be. Because honestly, no one is “normal,” so what’s the point of faking it? Don’t waste your time.

Thanks for reading,

Kae

acne really sucks.

PET PEEVE: when people who have had perfect skin their whole life try and tell everyone that if you just “drink more water” all of your acne will go away. Maaaaaaan, stop lyin. I carry a huge jug of water with me everywhere. I probably drink more water than you. The only constant non-water beverages in my house are unsweetened almond milk and aloe Vera juice. I have no choice but to drink water.

And don’t even get me started on the tea tree oil, witch hazel, and everything else everyone talks about. It may work for some people. But definitely not for me, cute.

During my sophomore and junior years of high school, my face was out of control. I would walk around school or wherever else I was, praying that no one would stare at my face for long periods of time or mention all of the craziness going on with my skin. It got so bad that no lie, I would cry myself to sleep. Pretty melodramatic, but it’s the truth. I felt pretty close to hopeless because I had tried so many different products, both over the counter and dermatologist prescribed. It still didn’t work. Acne sucks.

And, I’m not the type of chick who wears makeup because 1. I don’t really know how to 2. It takes too much time/effort and 3. I just don’t care enough, + I’m chill with my natural look. Because of this, whenever I do have acne, it’s even moooooore noticeable.

At the beginning of my senior year, my mom decided that she wanted me to try Proactiv. At first, I wasn’t too sure because I had heard so many stories of it not working, but about three months in, I truly started to see a change. My cheeks were covered in acne, and to all of a sudden see all of the bumps go away really shocked me. I started having less and less breakouts, and over time, I’m noticing how much my skin has really transformed. Won’t He do it.

Even now as I’m going into my first year of college, I look at old pictures and think “man, we’ve come a long way.” In one picture in particular, I remember the day I took it and myself thinking about how much clearer my skin was than the previous year. Now, I look at that same picture and think, “wow, if I thought that was relatively clear skin, old Kaesee should see me now.”

My skin is still in no way perfect. I still have a lot of scarring and dark spots, but in terms of visible acne, it is a million times better than it used to be. And Proactiv may not work for everyone, but for me, it was God sent.

So, thanks God for letting this become a reality.

If you struggle with acne, don’t give up hope! It may take longer than you’ve wanted, but you’ll find something that works for you. In the mean time, don’t let your situation keep you from being social or feeling confident because more than likely, people are probably like you and are too busy worrying about their own imperfections to even think about yours.

If you don’t feel beautiful, know that you still are, even though your skin may be disagreeing with you. This too shall pass.

Stay strong my friend,

Kae

summer: it’s been a good run.

With school (for most college people) beginning this Monday–tomorrow–my last official summer as a teenager is coming to an end. I’m a little bit sad, but I’ve definitely enjoyed every moment of it.

At the beginning of June, I shared with you all my Summer Bucket List, and I was able to successfully complete 22/28 things that I set out to do, which is a pretty good chunk.

Processed with VSCO with a6 preset

Processed with VSCO with a6 preset

For the past three months, I also made a summer memory jar that I try to do every once in a while for either the whole year, or at least a summer. My jar was filled with over 50 different moments that I thought were memorable enough to write down. Out of all of amazing times I had, here are some pictures of my favorites.

I’m so grateful for all of the people I got to spend time with and all of the laughs, pictures, and adventures that I had.

Processed with VSCO with a6 preset

 

Summer, you were amazing, but now it’s time for a new season(s). Figuratively: I’m stepping into a new season of schooling as I begin my first year of college, and literally: it’s about to be fall. Well not until the fall solstice, but you get the idea.

(Also, check out the summer recap video I uploaded!)

I can’t wait for all of the adventures ahead!

Kae

grateful.

Lately I’ve been trying to practice more gratefulness. I’ll read a scripture or look at the lives of others and tell myself that I should be more thankful for the little things and instead of complaining, that I should find things to be grateful for. You always hear stories about how people who are in the worst of situations are still smiling and genuinely loving life.

I would like to think of myself as a generally optimistic/positive person (hopefully I am…if I’m not, then I guess I’m slightly delusional). But I want to be able to find more ways that I can be a more enjoyable person to be around, and I think that practicing gratefulness is a great way to start.

To make sure that this doesn’t become one of those things that I hope to be but never actually implement, I put a cork board up on my wall (shout out to the media team at my church) and I told myself that at the end of every day, I would tack on five things that I was grateful for that day. This also gave me an excuse to put my Cricut (it’s a crafty machine that cuts things out, not an actually cricket lol) to use.

So here it goes. Today, I’m grateful for: 1. really good leftovers to eat when my mom isn’t home; 2. after church naps because I typically am not the napping type; 3. cheesy movies on Netflix; 4. finding some of the worship songs we used to sing at my church’s children’s ministry (that I still remember all of the dance moves to); 5. having one more week of summer vacation before school starts up again.

Side note: what’s crazy is that as I was typing out the top five things I was grateful for today, there were so many things that I thought of to include as the last thing. When you intentionally rehearse gratefulness, you start to notice all of the little things that made you happy in the day.

What are some things that you are grateful for today?

Kae

my creative process.

(The featured image of this post is one of my reeeeeally good friends who is a fellow artist. She painted this piece just this past week.)

A lot of times, you’ll hear people talking about how they are in a “creative funk,” or that they are experiencing some type of creative block. That’s because writing, crafting, or doing anything else creatively isn’t always so easy to do. Sometimes you don’t feel inspired, and it’s hard to make things when you’re in this state of mind.

Even when you’re not in a creative funk, it can be hard to begin a new project. Today, I’ve decided to share how I get into a creative mood and basically how I come up with all of my ideas.

One thing that is very important for me is to set aside time for creating, whether I’m dealing with greeting cards, graphic design, or some other random endeavor. Creativity is something that shouldn’t be rushed. Is it possible to finish a project in less than an hour? Probably. Will what I make be as genuine and polished as if I spent a some more time on it? Definitely not.

Any time I leave the house, I make sure to stuff my purse with a few non-negotiable items: phone charger, hand sanitizer, chapstick, lotion, and a small notebook. The notebook is one of the most important items because it’s where I write down any random ideas or notes that I come across throughout the day. You never know when a good idea is gonna come to you, so I highly suggest writing them down as soon as you get them.

My notebook is filled with random stuff; it’s pretty much organized how I think my brain would be. One page is filled with quotes from books or songs, one has random rectangles filled with card ideas, another with notes from a meeting…you get the idea, I pretty much use it to for everything. Once I get home, I sit at my desk and look through the notebook to go over all of the things I wrote down throughout the day.

Typically, I start out super excited to make something new. Usually because I have gotten some inspiration from Pinterest or somewhere else in the world, and I’m enthralled by the possibility of making something that I will truly to be proud of.

I turn on some music for brain food and think of all the ways I could execute my ideas.  A lot of times, I could be staring at my computer or piece of paper with no idea how to start; I know the general direction I want to go in, but I don’t know how to get there.By this point, I am most likely discouraged and am very mad that my idea didn’t just automatically come to life. But in spite of my lack of vision, I try something out anyways. Even if it doesn’t turn out how I imagined, I need to start somewhere in order to know which way works best.

A lot of times, failing in one way helps me to think of some other idea that I want to try. The point is that eventually, I will come to a place where what I have created is somewhat how I imagined it to be. The final product almost never comes out as I had first planned, but that’s not always a bad thing. After trudging through my own self-criticism, I sit back and look at what I’ve just made. I probably am still critical of it…but I’m happy that I’ve brought what once was an idea to something tangible.

Whatever you’re creative process is, embrace it!

Kae

 

back to the roots.

Kaesee Bourne: Daughter of Tony Bourne. Granddaughter of Woodrow Bourne. Great granddaughter of Levon Bourne. Great great granddaughter of Warren Bourne. Great great great granddaughter of Ishman Bourne. Great great great great granddaughter of Madison Bourne.

There’s something super special about going back to your roots. This past week, my family travelled to where most of our family originated from: Mississippi. Now most of you are probably thinking that Mississippi is a boring place filled with a bunch of ignorant small town people and far too many bugs. And that thought sometimes comes to my mind as well, but it is much more than that.

It’s a place that I can go and hear about all the things my family went through. I can listen to my grandma tell stories and catch frogs at my great grandparent’s house. I can pick blueberries with my great uncles and run around with my cousins as if we were kids again. Here, I am able to meet family I never even knew I had and watch as the Bourne “tree” grows.

I love that even if I don’t see some of my family members for years, we are able to pick up right where we left off. We have some things in common, but have fun hearing about all of the things that make us different as well.

In the week that we stayed in Mississippi, we went to the civil rights museum, fried a lot of fish, ate a bunch of good food, swam, explored the woods (many times, I thought I would be eaten alive by all of the bugs), and we even made a trip to New Orleans.

I don’t know how your family dynamic is, but if at all possible, you should make sure to stick close to them and reach out to find family members you may not have known you had.

Til next time,

Kae

my feelings on online shopping.

For the past few years, a lot of my friends have been raving about online shopping and talking about how amazing it is. I never really understood their passion about it because I’m more of a “physically go to the mall and shop” type of person.

However, ever since I got my own debit card, I’m slowly understanding why they prefer online shopping over actually going to a store. For one, it’s really convenient and almost effortless. Instead of traveling in my 122 degree metal vehicle, and melting into a pile of human as I walk from the car to the store, I can sit at the comfort of my desk, not complaining about the heat, but instead complaining about how efficiently my a/c works.

That reason alone is enough to make me have more of a liking towards online shopping…but there is one thing about it that hasn’t completely sold me. The waiting. Finding what you want and putting it into a virtual shopping cart is extremely easy, but once you select your form of payment, it could be days before you actually have what you just purchased in hand.

And I’m not a huge fan of that. In cases like this, I am the type of person who enjoys instant gratification. I’ve paid for something, so it should be at my disposal. For the whole week that I’m waiting for an item, I’m unusually eager to answer the door. I sullenly walk back to my room feeling bamboozled after I realize that the person who rang the doorbell was not in fact the UPS guy.

In spite of my feelings on waiting, online shopping hasn’t completely lost my interest. I love that it allows me to support small businesses and some of the peers around me. For instance, I just bought two different shirts from some pretty cool companies.

The first business I bought from is a brand called “Royal Priesthood.” What I love about this brand is that it’s founded by someone my age, who bases his designs off of faith based ideas. Super duper dope. Just recently, they partnered with another company and made the shirt that I decided to buy:

The other company that I bought from is called “Freely Project.” They sell jewelry and shirts that not only look good, but also help out other people. 35% of the profits from each purchase goes back to helping people transition out of homelessness. The shirt that I just recently bought is yellow, and it says “Mi generosidad puede cambiar vidas y dar esperanza al mundo entero,” in English, that’s “My generosity can change lives and give hope to the whole world.” For this shirt, 35% of the profits directly benefit the work of Refugio La Esperanza in Tijuana, Mexico.

Although I’m a fan of having things sooner rather than later, online shopping is definitely worth it when it helps to support brands like these. And maybe online shopping is good for me, it’ll help me practice patience.

When you get the chance, make sure you support small businesses and your friends!

Kae

leave your worries.

I don’t have anything lengthy to say today, but just wanted to share a really calming piece of writing I found the other. It has a lot to do with peace and the ocean…but does that really come as a surprise?

I hope that at some point this weekend, you have or will find time to let yourself relax and let all of your worries go.

Until next time,

Kae